Oh. My. Goodness.

So, part of me was disillusioned to think that being a working Momma would somehow make me feel like I possessed superpowers... being a wonderful Momma, a doting wife, a stellar teacher, a meal planner, a cook, a grocery shopper, and a maid. Hmmm. Not the case. I don't feel like Super Woman at all. I feel GUILTY to be at work. I feel JEALOUS that someone else is spending more time with my child than I am. I am experiencing serious separation anxiety to be away from B.

This week, I went back to work. Oh. My. Goodness. Heart-wrenching. I am not kidding. I felt pain. It hurt to leave my little sweetie. My sweet hubby took Monday off so that my transition might be a bit easier. Wow. I knew he was in good hands with his daddy, but still. Whew. I know I am not the first mommy to ever have to leave her baby to go back to work but I was the first mommy to leave MY baby to go back to work. It was so hard. I bawled Monday... but heck, I bawled Saturday and Sunday in anticipation of Monday, too. I was never so glad to see 3:30 roll around so I could head home. Seeing my sweet boy made my whole day better. Tuesday was a different kind of rough because I had to hand him off to the babysitter in the parking lot... and watch her drive away! She was wonderful though. She sent a few pictures and updates to put me at ease. Thursday, B stayed with my mama and Friday, his Gram came to keep him. This working mommy thing is hard... especially when there is NOWHERE I would rather be than with my sweet angel. I am really struggling with keeping it all in check. 90 more days of this school year... then summer begins. I can do this!

In other news... Bennett rolled over for the first time! Luckily, my Mama was watching him and thought to video it for Jonathan and me to see. I am glad we have this evidence because B refuses to perform for us! :)